A few months ago I had to go into the DMV to pick up my registration stickers and while I was there, I wanted to renew my driver’s license. Oddly enough, I’ve been hanging on to my (still valid) Indiana license, but it’s soon going to expire as my birthday is just around the corner. It went smoothly enough, as smoothly as you might expect at the DMV, but I ran into a little snag in getting the Virginia license. When they input my information into the computer, my Social Security number didn’t match up with the current information on my license. This is probably because I never officially changed my name with the Social Security people after I got married. Of course this never has been a problem with the IRS, the US Department of Defense or various financial institutions. But I think now that it could be that I’m a terrorist trying to get a Virginia driver’s license, they have to look a little closer at these things. And that’s fine — I’m certainly not complaining. I’m probably a more willing participant in security measures than most. The only problem was that I couldn’t actually get my license transferred because my name didn’t match the number in the system; and they couldn’t change the name on my license because the name on my current license didn’t match the name in the system. Ironically enough, the one way I would have to straighten this out would be to now officially change my name to my married name — even though I’m no longer married. I was beginning to feel like I was a lost soul at the desk of the DMV — my identity caught in some federal matrix or DMV purgatory. The only other thing I could do, advised the clerk at the counter, would be to bring in proof of the name change, such as my old marriage certificate or divorce decree. To me, this is actually all pretty funny — probably more hilarious than it should be. Perhaps you had to be there. Anyway, my ex-husband actually had an extra copy of the certificate in his files, so with that in hand, I’m headed off to the DMV again tomorrow morning to hopefully get my new Virginia driver’s license and become a real identifiable person again.

Then it hit me — what if I have to take the driver’s test again? At my previous visit, they didn’t mention it at all, but maybe we just hadn’t made it to that point in the process yet? According to the Virginia DMV website, to exchange your valid state license for a Virginia version, you may not be required to pass anything other than the vision screening and show proof of ID (ahem). But in that word “may”, lies a whole new realm of possibilities … like me suddenly forgetting the meaning of all traffic signs — or worse yet — having to parallel park on command. With an audience! I shudder to think. This set me on a mission to read up on the Virginia Driver’s Manual and even take their sample online quiz to see how I’d fare. The questions were mostly obvious and simple yet the mere idea of taking an exam sent terror straight into my heart — and sent me into a high school driver’s ed flashback. So I have a tendency to worry about things that will likely turn out just fine … it’s one of my many charms. Perhaps you’d still like to study along with me — just in case.